Also, my friend’s ex had a kid that always wanted to sleep in his mom’s bed and that would be a problem for me. I want all the perks that come with a grown-up relationship.” “A lot of my friends are divorced and one guy even has a kid after a one-night stand. — As a dating coach for single women over 40, one of the first questions I ask a client is, “What’s your biggest problem in dating? I recently asked a group of about 300 single, divorced, and widowed women over 40 what their biggest problems were in dating. They want to be appreciated for more than their bodies.” I want to know what they’ve tried and what their struggles are. I wanted to see how many struggled with the same issues. So guys, please pay attention to more than the boobs and the butt. Those things are far more important than a Harvard or Yale degree, or whether or not he speaks Mandarin.
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I went out with a girlfriend in Montclair, NJ, to a fun place called Just Jakes. It was a little deceiving, sure, but I thought telling the guys I was a single mom would influence their answers—and I wanted raw thoughts.
It was lovely being out sans Jack, having a cold beer at the bar, surrounded by other adults enjoying drinks, conversation, and music. I videotaped their answers, transcribed what they said, and here’s what I got: “It’s not the ideal situation for me.
The crowd was a mix of college guys and young professionals. And when the topic of my work came up, I told a small group of guys that I was working on an interesting article that required me to tap real-life guys for their opinions on dating single moms. It seems like baggage and I wouldn’t want to be involved in any baby-daddy drama.” “My mom was a single mom most of my childhood, so I have tons of respect for single mothers.
I would absolutely go on a date with a single mom and see where it could lead.
I don’t have kids, but I want kids, so if she already has one or two, it would be a bonus.
I would just be really cautious about getting close to the kid, because if it didn’t work out, I’d feel bad if the kid got attached, then hurt.” “I think it would be a pain.
My friend dated a single mom and she was always breaking plans because of childcare issues, or suggesting he just come over and watch a movie. Maybe she’s like my friend and had a baby after just dating someone. I dated a single mom who had a lot of issues with her ex and I found that I got sucked into a lot of drama.
I’m young and I want to have fun, out in the world, not be tied down to someone’s living room while her kid sleeps in the bedroom. I admire my friend for being a stand-up guy and taking care of his son, so my opinion of a woman doing the same … Also, her ex had issues with me being around his daughter because he was threatened by the relationship that was forming.
Are they unknowingly putting up guards that turn men off?